In an environment where people know me
First, think about my intention for asking for feedback and share that.
Seek feedback from people whose opinions I value or people who have a different world view than mine. How is the person I’m asking best suited to give me feedback?
Contract with the person/group to include:
Let others know that I am using some new skills and would benefit from feedback about how it is going.
Be specific about what I am trying to improve.
Am I asking for one-time or ongoing feedback?
Share my expectations:
- We would set a time to receive the feedback as soon after the event as possible, while the memory is fresh.
- I’m hoping the person will give me examples of when they experienced me at my best and examples when improvement would be helpful.
- I’ll do my best to listen to their feedback and not react.
Will that work for them?
What expectations do they have?
What questions do they have?
Asking for a “rewind”
Going back to someone after having an ineffective conversation and asking for the opportunity to have the conversation again