In an environment where people know me

First, think about my intention for asking for feedback and share that.

Seek feedback from people whose opinions I value or people who have a different world view than mine. How is the person I’m asking best suited to give me feedback?

Contract with the person/group to include:

Let others know that I am using some new skills and would benefit from feedback about how it is going.

Be specific about what I am trying to improve.

Am I asking for one-time or ongoing feedback?

Share my expectations:

  • We would set a time to receive the feedback as soon after the event as possible, while the memory is fresh.
  • I’m hoping the person will give me examples of when they experienced me at my best and examples when improvement would be helpful.
  • I’ll do my best to listen to their feedback and not react.

Will that work for them?

What expectations do they have?

What questions do they have?

Asking for a “rewind”

Going back to someone after having an ineffective conversation and asking for the opportunity to have the conversation again